


revenge is like a two-headed rat viper

by quenchycactusjuice



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Appa is the goodest boi, Avatar Cycle, Episode: s03e16 The Southern Raiders, Gen, Needlessly (a)angsty, Past Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-19
Updated: 2019-11-19
Packaged: 2021-02-13 01:09:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21485851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quenchycactusjuice/pseuds/quenchycactusjuice
Summary: The conversation between Aang and Katara in Southern Raiders (3x16) goes a little differently, and the Gaang get a sombre look into Aang's past.
Comments: 10
Kudos: 147





	revenge is like a two-headed rat viper

“I knew you wouldn't understand." The words are thrown at him, and he feels it like a physical blow. Katara's eyes bore into him, Zuko wordlessly agreeing with her as he stands by her side.

“Wait, stop! I do understand! You’re feeling unbelievable pain and rage. How do you think I felt about the Sandbenders stealing Appa? How –”

Maybe in another time, another place, Aang finishes his sentence. But not today.

“That is different and you know it!” Katara accuses him with a sweeping hand. “He was missing! You always had hope! You never had to find his body lying there, you never had to clean his blood and burned skin off the ice!”

“She needs this. To heal,” Zuko reasons with them, suddenly Katara’s staunchest ally.

Sokka, Suki, and Toph have all caught up by this point, watching on in incredulity. “Katara,” Sokka says gently, a quiet rebuke, “I think Aang might be right.” 

She rounds on him, “Then you didn’t love her the way I did!”

There’s a sharp breath from the group, and Sokka goes white.

Wrong. This is all _wrong_. It shouldn’t be like this. Aang breathes out through his nose, trying, _trying_ so hard to follow what the monks taught him. It’s all he has left of them, the many that were once his family.

He fails this time.

"You’re forgetting." The words come out as a hoarse croak, and the burning behind his eyes feels almost tangible. It is the feeling of something far older than himself. 

"You lost your mother, and that is terrible…terrible beyond measure." In the background Zuko's scar puckers in a frown. "But I lost them all. Everyone that was once dear to me. And not just once, I lost them over and over and over again. In every life.” 

Katara’s eyes have turned guilty, and she opens her mouth to protest. Aang shakes his head quickly, “No, listen. Please. In some of those lives I even wanted revenge, like you. But also not like you, because I was the Avatar. I drowned cities in waves as tall as mountains, I suffocated armies of thousands in just a few minutes, I drew fire clouds down from the volcanoes so hot that they incinerated the lungs of the enemies who had destroyed my family and my people. And other, much worse things. So don't tell me I don't understand, Katara. I do." 

He sees the horror in their eyes, and finds no satisfaction. His past lives crowd the edges of his mind, _their_ mind, all pressing into him with their stories of woe and destruction. In this moment he isn’t a child, isn’t just one person, but all of them. 

And they are tired, so tired. It’s a weariness that seeps into their bones and one that they’ll never be able to escape. But maybe they can stop Katara from making those same mistakes.

“I lost them all, Katara,” Aang repeats. “So don’t tell me I don’t understand.”

But he knows she’ll still go, just as he knows he’ll let her. He strokes Appa’s coarse hair, and his old friend lowering his head to touch a comforting, wet nose to Aang’s cheek. 

“Take care of them,” he whispers and walks away. Sokka and Toph move aside to let him pass in utter quiet.

No one tries to stop him.

The silence of the group is eerie. Because it's at times like these that they remember; remember the ancient and merciless entity that walks among them in the shape of a grey-eyed little boy.

**Author's Note:**

> This is based off a drabble I wrote for ff.net in 2013, and its incredibly self-indulgent.


End file.
